Today was the day! We were finally going to get rid of our boar (or as we like to refer to him, our 500lb. money pit)! We acquired him last spring from a friend that raises pigs as well. He gave Barney to us and told us to just pass him on when we were done. He finished his 'job' in May... We didn't find any takers for his services. Let me tell what happened today...
About 8:30am, KC, Cayna and I proceeded up to the barn (Cory was at school, thankfully) - I was dressed not like a farmer, but instead like someone who thought this was going to be an easy job and wanted to look and smell appropriately when going out in public. Through past experience, it has not taken long to move the pigs into the trailer... a little grain and in they go... what pig doesn't like food? That was my first mistake.
After setting up the area to move Barney, we were prepared to let Barney out of his stall and entice him with grain into the trailer. He made it to the barn door, put one foot on the ramp, shook his head no at me and turned around to go back to his stall. KC was behind him with a cattle gate - he couldn't get all the way back in, but the problem now was that we were right next to our sow... Ok everyone, just so you know for future reference - boys like girls, that is the natural way God intended. We cajoled, begged, pleaded, bribed with tomatoes, and yelled - I am proud to say we did not use any choice words as there was a preschooler present, but BOY, did we yell (and mainly at eachother). We put Barney back into his stall... This was after a good 2 hours. Uhh!
After settling down, rethinking our plan and changing my clothes, we decided that it might work better to back the truck up to the 2nd door in the barn. And we built a sort of tunnel system. I even tried to camoflauge the ramp by covering it with leaves, hay, etc. We got the feed bucket ready, had the tomatoes handy and KC was in position with the cattle gate. A little reminder here - Barney weighs at least 500 lbs. - Oh and normally when I'm trying to move a pig (I don't think I'm really any better at moving the pigs than KC, it just usually ends up being me), I use a sweet, high pitched voice, that really sounds nothing like me, but seems to work. With a few more tomatoes, Barney again left his stall and followed us through our new path. He looked at the sunshine, shook his head and turned around....again and again and again... UHHHHH!
KC came up with the brilliant plan... he said, let's just sit quiet and let Barney check it all out. Ok... I can do that. And we waited - probably about 30 minutes. He smelled the door, scratched himself on the door, smelled the yummy food on the trailer waiting for him and he took a step on the ramp! Then he put another foot on the ramp... and a 3rd... and a 4th...
He put his nose on the trailer, felt it bounce a little and went back into the barn! We lost him... again! I have to say that I really wanted to scream at the top of my lungs at this point. I did throw a tomato against the wall sometime during the day (yes, I know, quite the temper). We tried getting him to follow the grain bucket again, tried to get him to follow a tomato path again and well, I think we tried just about everything. I thought maybe it was the sunlight that was bothering him - SO, we put up walls and a roof over the ramp that he needs to walk across (I will show pictures tomorrow). That didn't make a difference either. To make things even better - at this point, Barney decided he had had enough and laid down to take a nap. What could we do, but go have lunch...
During lunch, I said to KC, 'there must be something positive from all of this'. He being the optimist in the family said the following things were positive - 1. We got to spend the day together 2. We were able to shell some beans together during lunch (I don't know how positive this was for me) 3. We learned that Barney is kind of cute depending on the light 4. Cayna did an AMAZING job waiting in the truck 5.We learned that patience really is a virtue and goes a long way when you choose to be patient, esp. with eachother.
I collected some apples during our break and we went back to try again with Barney. He wasn't really done with his nap. He wouldn't budge. And he wasn't hungry. We decided to call it a day. That was about 2pm. The trailer is still backed into position, the ramp is level, secure and covered. We will try again Friday morning...
Here is an excerpt from a pig book we keep handy for situations like this - 'Actually, the most difficult and time-consuming task on a great many farms with hogs is getting them from point A to point B while maitaining a modicum of dignity and your religion.' Well said... now, while I know we won't lose our religion over this, I can't help but think that God really had a good laugh today. To make myself feel better... pigs are listed as one of the smartest creatures on Earth...
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